New funny facebook status

1. Everyone that walks through my door makes me smile, some when they walk in and others when they walk out.

2.The cleaning bug is going around. I got bit by it today, but no worries, while I was cleaning I found that little booger and I killed the damn thing.

3. I cant make world peace, I aint got enough duck tape

4. I bought some underarm deodorant today it said...push up bottom...well my armpits are still sweaty, but my farts smell nice...