Really funny facebook status

1. You know ou are having a bad day, when the bird singing outside your window is a vulture.

2. THIS IS AMAZING ! Forward this to 5 people, and within 3 min. NOTHING WILL F*CKING HAPPEN! I tried it twice, and it worked both times! PEOPLE NEED TO KNOW !

3. I didnt fall for you. You just tripped me and i decided not to get up <3